Nov 29, 2010 ....My Family,
Thanksgiving was really good. I actually had Thanksgiving dinner twice. We had one on Thursday and then another last night. They were both really great! Each of them had sweet potatoes, and they were so delicious. I have to say my favorite part was pumpkin pie. I love pumpkin pie. I did miss having the craziness of being at home. For the most part there weren't very many people at each dinner. At least not what I'm used to. How was Thanksgiving for all of you?
The rest of the week was rough. We didn't find any new investigators again. We actually only found one potential investigator. That's pretty bad. People just didn't want to listen to us. We also had just about all of our teaching appointments fall through. Either people were sick, or had something else come up at the last minute. Elder Morris and I could also have done better on our part. We didn't do a very good job of following the plans we had made, and I got a little distracted with Thanksgiving. The blame falls on my shoulders really. I need to be a better example and make sure we're doing what we need to. I still feel good though. I feel like I've realized where I made my mistakes and now I am ready to go out and do better. Also, I know there were many good things that happened last week. I did start writing in my journal again. I hadn't been very good about writing every night over the last month and a half. I've written the last four nights in a row now. It's really great. I love writing in my journal. In my first three months I filled a journal. Now I am not even half way through my current journal. Another great thing that happened, and probably the best thing all week, was that Misa got herself to church. We didn't have to call and remind her or anything like that. She made the necessary call and found a ride to church and home from church. That's a really good indicator of how much progress she has made. Speaking of Misa, she is getting baptized this Saturday. We still have a lot to go over with her. This week is going to be pretty crazy. I will be very happy once it all works out.
Last week I was preparing a lesson for our Thanksgiving dinner on Thursday and I ended up using President Monson's talk from last conference that is in this months Ensign. It's a really great talk about being grateful and how it can bless our lives. I highly encourage each of you to find it and read it. You could get some really great quotes from it.
Mom, I have a favor to ask. Could you, or Emma email some pictures from my mission to President Barry for me? He wants 3 or 4 for our Christmas Zone Conference. So if you would send them to him I would really appreciate it. They need to be sent today! Make sure they're good pictures...nothing crazy. The email address is .com. You'll want to let him know that they are my pictures...I think that should be it.
I'm trying to think if there is anything else I can write, but last week was really uneventful. It's strange. I really can't think of anything. Well, I guess I'll talk to you all next week. I won't be writing on Monday because P-day is going to be on Tuesday because it's transfers. I don't think I'm going anywhere.
Love Always, Zach
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Thanksgiving day
The holidays are filled with lots of work.. especially when you have 11 children, 4 children-in-laws, and 7 grand kids. I must admit that I love every minute of it! When everyone is here the house is filled with screams a hum of activity. It's lively and busy. Almost everyone made it this year, we missed Zach's smiling face, Keaton, who was with his mother, and Heather, Ryan and Brooklyn. We look forward to next year when Zach will be home and hopefully the others will be able to join us.
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| Not sure what Nate is doing. Maybe he's checking to see if he belongs to the "clean plate" club. |
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The clean-up crew. |
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Giving Thanks...
11/22/10...Dear Family,
How is life back home and in Texas? It's good here. I'm finally feeling normal. I don't think I really ever mentioned it, but I've been sick the entire time I've been here in Gainesville. When Elder Morris came from the MTC he was sick, and I caught whatever it was that he had. I had that for awhile. Then it seemed like it was one thing after another. The last few days I've finally started to feel normal. It's really nice. I was even feeling well enough to finally exercise this morning! I've been bummed that I haven't had the energy to exercise. I'm hoping I can stay healthy for awhile.
The weather here has been really great. It's been in the 70's and 80's the last week or two. A few weeks ago it got pretty chilly, but now it's fantastic! We don't have to worry about jackets or anything like that right now. I also don't have to worry about getting all sweaty. I heard it's been snowing more back home. I miss the snow. It just doesn't feel like fall out here. I actually miss sitting inside drinking hot chocolate while it's snowing outside. Surprisingly I've made hot chocolate a few times out here. I really didn't think I ever would. It was tasty.
The work is going well. It's going better with the members than it is with investigators. Misa is still moving along nicely. On Saturday she went to a kids baptism. I'm happy she was there. She's been worried about the water being too deep, but now she's doing a little better. He fiance was at the baptism too. We had a lesson with a few members afterward, and it helped both of them. Her fiance is slowly warming up to the idea of taking lessons. The rest of our investigators are hanging in there by a thread. We haven't been able to find any good investigators lately either. I don't know what's going on. Hopefully the members will start giving us referrals soon.
Elder Morris and I have had some funny experiences. We have one investigator who says weird things. A few weeks ago we were teaching him about prayer, and he said that when he prays he imagines God looking like Gandalf from Lord of the Rings. It was really bizarre. Then a week or two after that we gave his wife a blessing because she had hurt her eye. Well, on the way out he said that if the blessing didn't work he could just go find a shaman. He then continued to explain that's it's "just a witch doctor." He's usually good for a laugh or two. He's been progressing very slowly. He is an investigator that the last Elders in this area were working with. Last week we were tracting before an appointment and we tracted into this old lady. When she answered the door we asked how she was doing, and she said," I'm moving....I'm still moving," and while she said this she started dancing. It was hilarious! Not to mention that it took her about a minute to figure out how to unlock the front door of her house. We could hear her turning the lock and messing with it. It was just a funny experience.
I'm really excited for Thanksgiving. I am going to eat so much! I hope I get to have some pumpkin pie. That's one of my favorite things about this time of year. Speaking of Thanksgiving I've been thinking about all the wonderful blessing in my life and the things that I am thankful for. There is so much! I have decided that I will list a few...they are in no particular order.
1.Clean drinking water.
2.Clothing that fits and is clean.
3.My health.
4.That I was able to fix my shoes.
5.Religious freedom.
6.Time to write you guys every week.
7.MY AWESOME FAMILY!!
8.Everything people have given up so I can be out here.
9.Your support and love.
10.Your emails and letters.
11.My bike.
12.A car to drive.
13.All the things I have learned while out here.
14.The spiritual growth I've had while out here.
15.The constant companionship and guidance of the Holy Ghost.
16.The scriptures.
17.A place to rest my head at night.
18.That I can talk to my Father in Heaven through prayer.
19.That He loves me enough to answer those prayers.
20.The Plan of Salvation, and that I can be with all of you again for eternity!
21.Jesus Christ and His infinite sacrifice.
22.Patience.
23.Forgiveness.
24.The people who have worked so hard and helped me through the good times and the bad.
25.Technology that makes it possible to communicate with loved ones across the nation.
That's it for now. Speaking of communicating with people across the nation, in a little over a month I'll be able to call you guys! It's crazy to think about. I hadn't even thought about it until just now. Also, yesterday was my seven month mark. Time is flying by. I see Elder Morris and Elder Camp, who came out last transfer, and I try remember what it was like to be in their shoes. It seems like so long ago.
My time is up. I'll write you guys next week.
Love Always, Zach
How is life back home and in Texas? It's good here. I'm finally feeling normal. I don't think I really ever mentioned it, but I've been sick the entire time I've been here in Gainesville. When Elder Morris came from the MTC he was sick, and I caught whatever it was that he had. I had that for awhile. Then it seemed like it was one thing after another. The last few days I've finally started to feel normal. It's really nice. I was even feeling well enough to finally exercise this morning! I've been bummed that I haven't had the energy to exercise. I'm hoping I can stay healthy for awhile.
The weather here has been really great. It's been in the 70's and 80's the last week or two. A few weeks ago it got pretty chilly, but now it's fantastic! We don't have to worry about jackets or anything like that right now. I also don't have to worry about getting all sweaty. I heard it's been snowing more back home. I miss the snow. It just doesn't feel like fall out here. I actually miss sitting inside drinking hot chocolate while it's snowing outside. Surprisingly I've made hot chocolate a few times out here. I really didn't think I ever would. It was tasty.
The work is going well. It's going better with the members than it is with investigators. Misa is still moving along nicely. On Saturday she went to a kids baptism. I'm happy she was there. She's been worried about the water being too deep, but now she's doing a little better. He fiance was at the baptism too. We had a lesson with a few members afterward, and it helped both of them. Her fiance is slowly warming up to the idea of taking lessons. The rest of our investigators are hanging in there by a thread. We haven't been able to find any good investigators lately either. I don't know what's going on. Hopefully the members will start giving us referrals soon.
Elder Morris and I have had some funny experiences. We have one investigator who says weird things. A few weeks ago we were teaching him about prayer, and he said that when he prays he imagines God looking like Gandalf from Lord of the Rings. It was really bizarre. Then a week or two after that we gave his wife a blessing because she had hurt her eye. Well, on the way out he said that if the blessing didn't work he could just go find a shaman. He then continued to explain that's it's "just a witch doctor." He's usually good for a laugh or two. He's been progressing very slowly. He is an investigator that the last Elders in this area were working with. Last week we were tracting before an appointment and we tracted into this old lady. When she answered the door we asked how she was doing, and she said," I'm moving....I'm still moving," and while she said this she started dancing. It was hilarious! Not to mention that it took her about a minute to figure out how to unlock the front door of her house. We could hear her turning the lock and messing with it. It was just a funny experience.
I'm really excited for Thanksgiving. I am going to eat so much! I hope I get to have some pumpkin pie. That's one of my favorite things about this time of year. Speaking of Thanksgiving I've been thinking about all the wonderful blessing in my life and the things that I am thankful for. There is so much! I have decided that I will list a few...they are in no particular order.
1.Clean drinking water.
2.Clothing that fits and is clean.
3.My health.
4.That I was able to fix my shoes.
5.Religious freedom.
6.Time to write you guys every week.
7.MY AWESOME FAMILY!!
8.Everything people have given up so I can be out here.
9.Your support and love.
10.Your emails and letters.
11.My bike.
12.A car to drive.
13.All the things I have learned while out here.
14.The spiritual growth I've had while out here.
15.The constant companionship and guidance of the Holy Ghost.
16.The scriptures.
17.A place to rest my head at night.
18.That I can talk to my Father in Heaven through prayer.
19.That He loves me enough to answer those prayers.
20.The Plan of Salvation, and that I can be with all of you again for eternity!
21.Jesus Christ and His infinite sacrifice.
22.Patience.
23.Forgiveness.
24.The people who have worked so hard and helped me through the good times and the bad.
25.Technology that makes it possible to communicate with loved ones across the nation.
That's it for now. Speaking of communicating with people across the nation, in a little over a month I'll be able to call you guys! It's crazy to think about. I hadn't even thought about it until just now. Also, yesterday was my seven month mark. Time is flying by. I see Elder Morris and Elder Camp, who came out last transfer, and I try remember what it was like to be in their shoes. It seems like so long ago.
My time is up. I'll write you guys next week.
Love Always, Zach
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Get your pens and paper ready...
How are things going? I'm doing really well. Last week was a great week! Monday was normal. On Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday I got to go to Jacksonville for a leadership meeting. It was wonderful! I learned so much. It was great being with all the other leaders and being able to get training and guidance directly from President Barry. He is a really wonderful man. Sister Barry is great too. I stayed in Jacksonville for all three days. While I was gone Elder Morris went and worked with another Elder in a different area.It wasn't only great to get the training we did, but also to see another area for a few days. My temporary companion was Elder Huntsman. He used to be my Zone Leader, but now he's training too. He's a really great missionary. I learned a lot from him too. It was a pretty amazing three days. The Spirit was really intense during the meetings. On Tuesday the meeting started at 9am and ended at 4pm. Then for Wednesday and Thursday we had to be there at 8am and it went to 4pm. We had a few short breaks. They were long days. There was, and still is, so much information to process. I also get to teach the things I learned to Elder Morris. We've already started going over a lot of it, and I'm happy to say he's learning quickly. When we got back to our area we picked up right where we left off.
As far as investigators go, Misa is still incredible. We set a for sure baptism date of December 4th. We were originally going to have it on the 20th of this month, but we all felt that it would be better for her to move it to the 4th. She is really excited and so am I. She is making a lot of progress. I'm hoping she'll ask Elder Morris to baptize her. It would be so great for him. It would make me so happy, and I know it would be special to him too. Helping people get baptized is always really great, but being the person who performs the actual ordinance is very special. Either way I know it will be wonderful, especially for Misa.
Well, it finally happened. I crashed on my bike. I was turning and my back tire hit a small patch of sand. Next thing I know my bike was falling over and it was sliding down the road while I was almost standing on top of it. Luckily I was okay. More importantly my bike is fine! I was really worried that something might have happened to it. Pretty much everything was fine...except my left shoe. When I fell most of my weight was on my left foot and my toe ended up dragging along the road. So, the toe of my left shoe is just about destroyed. I was able to lather on the shoe polish and get it looking decent, but it still has two big tears along the front. Today I'm going to try to figure out a way to fix it. The tears don't go all the way through so I think I'll try sanding them down and then putting a ton of shoe polish on it. I really hope it works. If not I'm going to have to go and find a cheap pair of shoes the will hopefully last. Wish me luck! Well, now is the time for me to explain the title of this email. A few weeks ago President Barry gave all of us a binder with important papers in it. Well, I was looking through it and discovered there are some new email rules for our mission. To put it plainly I will no longer be sending my emails to the majority of you. The rule says I am only supposed to email immediate family members. I am only supposed to email the following people: Grandparents, parents, brothers, and sisters. So, those are the people who will be receiving my emails. I know that by following this rule I will be able to focus more and help more people. There is a quote that keeps coming to my mind. Elder Bruce R. McConkie once said,"Faith is a gift of God bestowed as a reward for personal righteousness. It is always given when righteousness is present, and the greater the measure of obedience to God's laws, the greater will be the endowment of faith." I know this to be true, and I need to be obedient to even the small things. This is really the only time in my life where I can dedicate myself completely so serving the Lord. So, I want to do it the right way. However, this doesn't mean that you won't be able to hear from me at all. You can always go and check out my facebook page. I know Emma is still doing a great job of updating it. Also, you might be able to have my emails forwarded to you from someone who gets them. Either way is fine, and it will definitely help me focus. There is one other option, and it's my favorite. YOU CAN WRITE ME A LETTER!! I can't tell you how wonderful it is to get a letter in the mail. So for now you can send them to my current address, but it would be better if you sent them to the mission office. That way when I get transferred there isn't the chance of me never getting it. So, send your letters to the following address.
8663 Baypine Rd. STE 102
Jacksonville, FL 32256
Send them here and I will write you back as soon as I can. You'll need to be patient because I'm not going to get that mail super often, but I would love to hear from all of you! You all mean the world to me, and I appreciate everything you have done to help me be the person I am today. I look forward to your letters.
Love Always, Zach
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| Leadership Training |
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
It's a special day...
There are two birthday boys today!
Taylor, who is turning 8 and Randy.
Happy Birthday!
I'm so excited that Taylor is 8. I've been looking forward to this day. We are going to carry on Grandma and Grandpa Snows tradition of taking the grandkids to pizza on their 8th birthday.
So get ready Taylor, you get to be the first!
Taylor, who is turning 8 and Randy.
Happy Birthday!
I'm so excited that Taylor is 8. I've been looking forward to this day. We are going to carry on Grandma and Grandpa Snows tradition of taking the grandkids to pizza on their 8th birthday.
So get ready Taylor, you get to be the first!
Monday, November 8, 2010
gators...
The last week went by pretty quickly. They all seem like they go by quickly. Elder Morris and I are doing well. We are still bonding and getting to know each other better every day. We do really well together. He is learning quickly and starting to get more comfortable in lessons. He's definitely going to be a great missionary. I've seen quite a bit of change in him the last few weeks. I've also noticed that I've changed as well. A few weeks ago when I found out I was going to be training one of my leaders told me, "Training is an opportunity to get really good really fast." I knew he was right when he told me that, but now I know with even more assurance that it's true. There are barriers that used to really hold me back and now they aren't much of a problem at all. I still have A LOT to learn and do, but I am making good progress and I'm happy.
I'm happy to say that the apartment feels like home now. The only problem is that I'm convinced the heater doesn't work properly. It's been cold the last few days, and in the mornings its not pleasant walking around in a cold apartment. We do a pretty good job of keeping it clean. At times the kitchen sink gets filled with other people's dishes, but they eventually clean it up. We also have a washer and dryer in our apartment. That means no more having to pay four bucks a week to do laundry!
Misa is progressing quickly. She has such a great desire to learn the gospel and live righteously. We had a really cool experience with her last week. During our very first lesson a few weeks ago we briefly mention the Word of Wisdom and what it entails. We told her we would teach about it later. Well, last week we decided it was time to really teach it in detail and commit her to living it. We got about halfway through the lesson and she got up and went to grab something from the fridge. She showed it to us and it was a jug of tea. She said she had drank some earlier that day on accident. She told us she didn't mean to and felt bad about it. It made Elder Morris and I smile because we hadn't even finished teaching her about the Word of Wisdom or committed her to living it. She was already trying to live it. She is really wonderful.
We found a few new investigators. They are all wonderful people. Some of them are going to take quite a bit of time, but I look forward to helping them come closer to Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. We had a pretty cool experience during a lesson. We went to teach a new investigator named Iva, and when we got there her older brother was there. We introduced ourselves and he was pretty cold towards us. I could see the disdain in his eyes. We started the lesson and he decided to join us. I know he only did it because he was looking for a reason to argue with us. As we progressed through the lesson he started participating more and more. We got to a point where we talked about Joseph Smith and the First Vision. Iva said she had a hard time believing it. Before Elder Morris or I could say anything her brother was explaining to her that it was possible. His heart had been softened by the Spirit. It was such a wonderful moment. We also read from Moroni 10:3-5 and he sat next to Iva, she had the Book of Mormon, so he could read it. At the end of the lesson he apologized for being rude when we first got there. He also asked for a copy of the Book of Mormon. It was really special. He said he'd read from it, but didn't want to set up any kind of return appointment. A seed was planted in his heart and hopefully someday a missionary will be there to help him prepare to be baptized.
That's all for now....next week there are going to be some changes with my emails...
Love Always, Zach
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Waiting for mommy to get back...
Yesterday Aliyah stayed home with her grandma (me) while mommy and daddy went to work. She wasn't too happy to be left behind. Shortly after Sarah left I noticed that she had left my room and it was extraordinarily quite. I went into the family room and found her asleep on the floor in front of the french doors, I guess she was waiting for her mommy to get back. How cute is the little tear in her eye!?!
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Trial by fire...
11/1/10...Hello,
Well, this last week has been pretty nuts! I named this email "Trial by fire..." because that's what I feel like this is. I've been put into an area that I don't know anything about with a companion who is looking to me for guidance and council yet at times I feel like I have no clue. Being whitewashed into and area and training at the same time is not something I thought I would be doing on my mission. Oh, being "whitewashed" is when they move both missionaries out of an area and put in different missionaries...sorry if that's unclear. Anyway, I've been busy trying to get things organized and helping Elder Morris learn all that I can. I'm happy to say that things are moving along nicely now. I've definitely been praying with extra fervor the last week or so, and Heavenly Father has been blessing me.
Those first few days were pretty strange. I felt so out of place. Funny story...I sleep on a full sized bed. So, throughout the night I move a lot and get all turned around. Haha there have been a few times where I'll go to get up in the morning and the room is so dark that I don't know which way I should go to get out of bed. I would keep sticking my feet out and bumping them on things. I'm happy to say that I finally figured it out, and I'm not having that problem as much anymore.
At times I catch myself thinking about Ocala. I wonder how the new are Elders doing. I really hope they are taking good care of things. I did my best to make it a smooth transition for them and to make sure things were organized. I hope it worked out. I definitely miss the people down there.
Elder Morris and I get along really well. He has a great attitude and is very smart. He's been learning quickly. We've been able to find a few new investigators and they are pretty neat. One of them is named Misa. It's like Lisa, but with an M. It's a miracle we found her. We went to see a potential investigator that the last Elders had left for us. When we were walking up to her door a little girl was walking up at the same time. As we waited for the potential investigator to answer the door we asked the little girl if her parents would be interested in hearing a message about Jesus Christ. She said that her parents wouldn't, but her grandma might want to. The potential investigator didn't answer so we went to this little girls house and talked to her grandmother. Her grandmother wasn't interested, but her older sister was. Misa is the little girl's older sister. She came to church yesterday and enjoyed it. Things are going well with her.
Elder Morris and I have had some fun experiences. They're things that I've gotten used to, but are a real eye opener for him. I'm not really going to go into detail, but I will say that the ghetto part of town is very different haha...
The apartment we live in is pretty small. It's got two bedrooms and one bathroom. The bedrooms are...cozy. We share with two other Elders. They are Elder Bagley and Elder Camp. They're great. We have a lot of fun. There is a park across the street from our apartment and last night while we were leaving to go to dinner there were people LARPing there. LARPing is Live Action Role Playing. If that doesn't clear it up, LARPing is essentially when people dress up like knights and go fight each other with big foam swords. I never expected to see anything like that out here. I got a good chuckle out of it.
The ward here is great. The members are all young. I would say the majority of them are in their mid-twenties to mid-thirties. Yesterday when I went to our meeting before church I was shocked. Most of the leaders couldn't have been more than a few years older than me. They're very friendly people.
Love Always, Zach
Well, this last week has been pretty nuts! I named this email "Trial by fire..." because that's what I feel like this is. I've been put into an area that I don't know anything about with a companion who is looking to me for guidance and council yet at times I feel like I have no clue. Being whitewashed into and area and training at the same time is not something I thought I would be doing on my mission. Oh, being "whitewashed" is when they move both missionaries out of an area and put in different missionaries...sorry if that's unclear. Anyway, I've been busy trying to get things organized and helping Elder Morris learn all that I can. I'm happy to say that things are moving along nicely now. I've definitely been praying with extra fervor the last week or so, and Heavenly Father has been blessing me.
Those first few days were pretty strange. I felt so out of place. Funny story...I sleep on a full sized bed. So, throughout the night I move a lot and get all turned around. Haha there have been a few times where I'll go to get up in the morning and the room is so dark that I don't know which way I should go to get out of bed. I would keep sticking my feet out and bumping them on things. I'm happy to say that I finally figured it out, and I'm not having that problem as much anymore.
At times I catch myself thinking about Ocala. I wonder how the new are Elders doing. I really hope they are taking good care of things. I did my best to make it a smooth transition for them and to make sure things were organized. I hope it worked out. I definitely miss the people down there.
Elder Morris and I get along really well. He has a great attitude and is very smart. He's been learning quickly. We've been able to find a few new investigators and they are pretty neat. One of them is named Misa. It's like Lisa, but with an M. It's a miracle we found her. We went to see a potential investigator that the last Elders had left for us. When we were walking up to her door a little girl was walking up at the same time. As we waited for the potential investigator to answer the door we asked the little girl if her parents would be interested in hearing a message about Jesus Christ. She said that her parents wouldn't, but her grandma might want to. The potential investigator didn't answer so we went to this little girls house and talked to her grandmother. Her grandmother wasn't interested, but her older sister was. Misa is the little girl's older sister. She came to church yesterday and enjoyed it. Things are going well with her.
Elder Morris and I have had some fun experiences. They're things that I've gotten used to, but are a real eye opener for him. I'm not really going to go into detail, but I will say that the ghetto part of town is very different haha...
The apartment we live in is pretty small. It's got two bedrooms and one bathroom. The bedrooms are...cozy. We share with two other Elders. They are Elder Bagley and Elder Camp. They're great. We have a lot of fun. There is a park across the street from our apartment and last night while we were leaving to go to dinner there were people LARPing there. LARPing is Live Action Role Playing. If that doesn't clear it up, LARPing is essentially when people dress up like knights and go fight each other with big foam swords. I never expected to see anything like that out here. I got a good chuckle out of it.
The ward here is great. The members are all young. I would say the majority of them are in their mid-twenties to mid-thirties. Yesterday when I went to our meeting before church I was shocked. Most of the leaders couldn't have been more than a few years older than me. They're very friendly people.
Love Always, Zach
No more Ocala
10/26/10...Dear Family and Friends,
I only have five minutes to write.
We received transfer calls on Saturday night and I am no longer in Ocala. I have been transferred to Gainesville, FL. Also, I received a phone call from President Barry on Sunday night, and I am training!! It's pretty crazy. I met my new Elder today. His name is Elder Morris and he's from Indio, CA. He seems like a great young man. I wasn't really too shocked when President Barry called me. I've had the feeling that I was going to train or get some kind of leadership calling for the last few weeks. I'm really excited and nervous. I know I won't be able to do this without the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost.
With that being said, we have our work cut out for us. Especially this next week or two. We have to learn a brand new area together. I'm excited.
That's all for now. I will write more next week.
Love Always, Zach
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